


Sprechen sie Deutsch?

by lrhaboggle



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: English, F/F, Flirting, German, Humor, LGBT, Lesbian, Multilingual, Post Movie, Taunting, Teasing, beca finally one-ups Kommissar, google translate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 17:38:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14242413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lrhaboggle/pseuds/lrhaboggle
Summary: DSM loves to make fun of the Bellas to their faces in German. If only Kommissar knew that one of them understood her native language.





	Sprechen sie Deutsch?

Kommissar and Pieter stood side by side, wearing matching smirks as they passed the Barden Bellas.

"Hope you enjoyed the car show!" Pieter said as they passed. He received no response from the sullen Americans.

"Don't worry Pieter!" Kommissar said loudly. "Sie sind eifersüchtig, dass wir so viel besser als Sie sind. Aber ich denke, das ist, was passiert, wenn Sie eine Maus verantwortlich für eine Reihe von Verlierern setzen!" she added with a harsh laugh that Pieter echoed heartily. The pair still received no response, but this time, neither had expected it. That was the best part about being multilingual! You could insult anyone and they would never truly know what you said, therefore, they wouldn't be able to make a comeback. Instead, they would only be able to stand there, looking angry and stupid, just like the Bellas were now.

"Ah well, auf wiedersehen, my little losers." Kommissar smirked, giving the Bellas a taunting wave. "Und auf wiedersehen to mein kleine maus!" she added, looking specifically at the Bellas' tiny leader. The leader met her eyes for a split second before looking away with an angry expression, but Kommissar could see the red tinting her cheeks and she gave a victorious smile before turning away to follow the rest of her team out of the dealership, leaving a very flustered mouse in her wake.

Kommissar and Pieter were at the basement's mini-bar, celebrating their Riff Off victory with a hearty dose of beer. A few sips into their drinks, however, Kommissar felt Pieter nudge her shoulder. She looked at him and he looked at her, flicking his head to the other side of the bar. Ah yes, the little Feisty Mouse was there. A wicked grin lit up Kommissar's face as she thought of new ways to torment and fluster the poor, little, American singer. She really was quite cute, and her insult-compliments were something Kommissar enjoyed greatly. She turned back to Pieter who only needed that one look to know what she had in mind. He stood back, grinning eagerly as Kommissar approached the little troll. Another verbal beat down! Highlight of his day.

"Oh, poor little Barden Bellas," Kommissar sighed mockingly as she stepped closer to the Bella.

"Just go away," Feisty Mouse replied tiredly, too embarrassed by the defeat to even try to insult Kommissar.

"Come, now, don't get too down on yourself," Kommissar soothed. The brunette paused her sulking to meet Kommissar's sharp blue eyes. Kommissar saw disbelief mingled with hope in her brown eyes and Kommissar's gentle smile instantly turned back into its usual smirk. "Do not be surprised that you lost. We are the best," she said. Behind her, Pieter began to laugh while the Bella's surprised expression returned to its previous irritation and unhappiness.

"Why don't you just use that pretty mouth of yours to drink your beer and shut up?" she grunted. Then her eyes widened. "Damnit."

"Ah! Sie ist wirklich eine lebhafte Maus, nicht wahr?" Kommissar cried in amusement at the daring remark.

"Sie ist!" Pieter agreed with a nod. "Obwohl ich würde sagen, Ihre Bemerkung war mehr flirten. Was denkst du?"

"Ja! Du hast Recht! Es war unglaublich kühn. Vielleichtsollten wir Ihren Namen ändern, um zu flirten Maus!" Kommissar agreed, then she leaned towards the Bella. "Sie sind sehr nach vorn, nicht wahr, Maus? Aber sagen Sie mir, ist es nicht etwas anderes, das Sie lieber meine "hübsche Mund" tun, als Bier trinken?" she asked. This seductive remark received another howl of laughter from Pieter while the mouse in question looked away, probably in confusion because she, being a mere American, would not know German. Kommissar laughed to herself.

"Sie ist so süß! Ich könnte Sie einfach auffressen!" Kommissar said as her maus turned away again.

"Sie würden mehr als das tun, mein Freund!" Pieter replied with a smirk and Kommissar couldn't help but agree.

"Look, why don't you guys just go rub your victory in someone else's faces, ok?!" Maus finally cried. The Germans were taken aback by this sudden boldness from Tiny, Feisty Maus, but it didn't take them long to recover.

"Sie klingt sogar wie eine winzige Maus!" Pieter exclaimed and Kommissar agreed again.

"Aber vielleicht hat Sie Recht." the blond laughed. "Vielleichtsollten wir jetzt gehen. Wir haben viel besseres Unternehmen in sowieso." then she gave the poor girl another teasing look before walking away, taking Pieter with her and leaving a very flustered mouse in her wake.

A few months later, the Barden Bellas had somehow defeated DSM at the World Championship for Acappella. Kommissar was slightly disappointed and annoyed that this tiny, pathetic, American team had defeated the mighty and beloved DSM, but Kommissar was not a sore loser. Instead, during the after-party, while her teammates were drinking and dancing through the Copenhagen hotel, Kommissar went to the Barden Bella Hall to congratulate them and to see her mouse again. She knew how she could still win a small part of the night…

The Bella Hall was easy to find because of the party décor. Kommissar smirked at the garish banners and balloons, then she walked over to one of the doors and knocked.

"What are you doing here?!" a ginger head came from the door and its owner glared up at her like they were still rivals.

"I just wish to speak with Feisty Mouse," Kommissar replied evenly, totally unbothered by this girl's open hostility. "I only wish to congratulate her on tonight's win!" she swore. The ginger continued to glare at her warily, but she did finally cave. She turned away from the blond to holler back into the hotel room.

"Beca! Tall, hot, and German is here to see you!" she screamed. Kommissar raised an eyebrow, but she said nothing.

"What are you on about, Chloe?" a tired voice asked a moment later and Kommissar had to fight back a laugh. Her maus, the Tiny Kicker of Ass, was in sky blue PJs that were covered in sleeping clouds. It was absolutely priceless! Beca, meanwhile, paled at once when she realized what Chloe had said and who it was that had come knocking. She tried to take a step back into the room, but Chloe only pushed her out again with a wicked smirk. Then she proceeded to shut the door, make sure to slam it to illustrate how locked out Beca was going to be for at least the next 15 minutes.

"I want to congratulate you, Feisty Mouse," Kommissar said as the door shut, leaving Beca stuck in the hall with her. She let her eyelids lower lazily. Beca could only stare up at her, silent and open-mouthed. Kommissar mentally cheered at this because this was her victory. Knowing that she still flustered her maus, even now, was her victory. Kommissar then spent the next few minutes doing her very best to fluster the girl in any way she could and weasel more accidental compliments from her.

"Damnit." Beca finally sighed for about the 13th time that night. Kommissar was still grinning from ear to ear. She loved toying with the little American far too much to want to stop now. But Beca, on the other hand, was tired of being humiliated.

"Are you jealous?" she asked suddenly, growing surprisingly serious. "If this is your way of coping with loss, them I'm sorry you didn't believe the Bellas would beat you all senseless. Why are you really here?" she sounded mad, but Kommissar liked the sudden change. She was a Feisty Mouse to be sure!

"Ich bin hier, um in den Kopf zu bekommen, Maus!"she replied, knowing Beca wouldn't be able to translate. Beca only glared back.

"You've spent the past year getting in my head!" she snapped. "When are you planning on leaving? Not that I want you to… Damnit!"

"Wait, Feisty Mouse has understood me?" Kommissar asked, missing Beca's compliment out of sheer shock. So the maus could translate after all. "Sprechen sie Deutsch?" she asked, just to make certain that she hadn't just imagined that the maus had somehow know how to speak German.

"Ja. Ich habe Deutsch in der schuel." Beca replied in perfect German. So Kommissar hadn't been hallucinating.

"Ich wusste nicht!" she replied defensively.

In spite of everything, finding out that some of the private taunts she had said hadn't been as private as she thought was somewhat unsettling and it led to a moment of surprise and uncertainty that made her defensive and almost tense. Kommissar wasn't used to being surprised or defeated or one-upped, but this tiny American had somehow managed to do all three within the span of one night. It was actually kind of terrifying where it wasn't almost refreshing.

"Das war irgendwie der Punkt," Beca smirked slightly. Kommissar's eyes widened. Beca really was a feisty mouse and it seemed that their roles had reversed for this moment, against all odds and expectations. Clearly, Beca was more than she appeared to be. No wonder Kommissar had found her to be so fascinating! Seldom had this mighty German found such an opponent as unique, surprising, new, fresh and challenging as this maus.

The pair stood in silence for just a moment more before Kommissar spoke again.

"So you understood Pieter and I at the car show and Riff Off?" she asked, going back to English.

"Yes." Beca nodded, a slight blush returning to her cheeks. Kommissar saw the blush and she knew that the role reversal was over and she was in power again. She had hit just the right spot to cause Beca to lose some of that confidence her surprise reveal had given her. Kommissar took full advantage of this little slip to pull herself back on top.

"Well, I suppose that is good," she said. Already, her voice had returned to its low, silky and smooth timbre and her posture radiated confidence and dominance once more while Beca grew increasingly small again. "I suppose that though I had not planned for you to know what I was saying, I am glad you did."

"Why do you say that, you German goddess?... Damnit!" Beca asked, trying and failing miserably to act tough. She could sense that her moment with the upper hand was dying.

"Because," Kommissar grinned. "I meant every word!" she said. Before Beca could reply, Kommissar lunged forward to kiss her.

"Scheiße!" Beca gasped as their lips met. Kommissar smirked to herself as she deepened the kiss…

"Gutten nocht, Feisty Mouse," she said finally, pulling away from the brunette and grinning at the little pout she received.

"Schlaft gute," came Beca's slightly unwilling reply. As much as it hurt to say, she already missed the feel of Kommissar's lips on hers and she wanted so much more than a simple kiss anyway… Damnit.

"Don't pout, meine maus," Kommissar soothed her ex-rival teasingly. "My room is 211, if you might need it," she added with a suggestive toss of her long gold hair. Then, with that, Kommissar left the Bella Hall, leaving a very flustered mouse in her wake.

**Author's Note:**

> AN: I've always liked the idea that Beca knew German (give her line in the first film) and I like the idea that DSM would bad-mouth the Bellas in German to their faces. Combining these headcanons led to this hilarity and I can so see it happening. 
> 
> Translations: (I used Google, so I apologize if they're horribly inaccurate)
> 
> They are just jealous that we are so much better than them! But I guess that's what happens when you put a mouse in charge of a group of losers!
> 
> Ah! She really is a feisty mouse, isn't she?
> 
> She is! Although I would say it was more flirty, wouldn't you?
> 
> Yes! You're right! It was a very bold remark! Perhaps we should change her name to Flirty Mouse!
> 
> You're very forward, aren't you, Mouse? But tell me, isn't there something else you'd rather my 'pretty mouth' do than drink beer?
> 
> She is so cute! I could just eat her up!
> 
> You would do more than that, my friend!
> 
> She even sounds like a mouse!
> 
> But maybe she's right. We have far better company we could be in, after all.
> 
> I just wish to get in your head, Mouse.
> 
> You speak German?
> 
> Yeah, I took German in school.
> 
> I didn't know!
> 
> That was kind of the point.
> 
> Shit.
> 
> Good night.
> 
> Sleep well.


End file.
